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Friendships… Everything Old Can be New Again

Everything Old Can Be New Again—Especially Friendships

Have you ever thought with affection about an old friend from school or camp or a past job with whom you lost touch? Perhaps you had a falling out, but more likely the lost friendship was a casualty of each of you focusing more on your immediate life with all of its demands.

You may flirt with the idea of reconnecting with that person. Today it’s easy to search the web for current information so that you can make contact. Making contact, however, risks rejection or disappointment. But nothing ventured, nothing gained. Once you’ve found that old friend, there are actions you can take from a safe distance to test the waters. Among them are:

1.  Friend them on Facebook or another social networking site. You can send a private message to gauge the interest of that friend to re-establish a relationship with you. Take it slow. Keep the initial contact light, friendly, and private. Resist the impulse to pour your heart out from the start. If the interest isn’t there, you can move along without really having invested yourself in this relationship.

2.  Identify someone you know who knows your old friend enabling you to instantly make a connection in the present.  Maybe the three of you can get together.

3.  Send a note or the perfect online ecard that lets your old friend know that you’re thinking about them. Make sure you provide information that allows your friend to communicate back to you.

There is not necessarily a quick and easy fix for a broken or neglected friendship. Like all meaningful relationships, opening this door —and keeping it open—requires work. So be sure you're willing to invest real time and effort into initiating a dialogue.

Be patient if you don’t get the response you’re hoping for immediately. Be open and honest to discuss what occurred in the past, especially if it was hurtful to one or both of you.

There is nothing like an old friend—someone with whom you share a history. Maybe she’s someone who saw your potential way back when…someone who laughed with you and cried with you and dreamed with you. If so, she’s worth the effort it takes to bring her back into your life—like new.